How NOT to be happy: 10 tips for unwavering woe

There’s a lot of talk these days about happiness. People wanting to get happy can do courses, read books, subscribe to forums, meditate, or follow any number of paths to proactively raise their happiness quotient.

But jolly isn’t for everyone.

What if you’d rather wallow in your own misery? Shouldn’t you have the right to your swamp of pain, your quicksand of lugubriousness, your quagmire of despair, if that’s the way (aha aha) you like it?

Yet what help exists for you if you’re one of these forgotten people? Where can you turn for support in a world gone glad?

Out of respect for unwavering woe-mongers – those who cling to their misery despite ever-mounting evidence that being happier is both possible and valuable in terms of health, success and relationships – I’ve put together some tips. Don’t be bullied into seeking joy any longer.

Follow these tips, and your happiness is sure to become be a thing of the past.

  • Tip 1: Take offense
  • Tip 2: Never take responsibility
  • Tip 3: Pity yourself
  • Tip 4: Be needy
  • Tip 5: Be ungrateful
  • Tip 6: Avoid reality
  • Tip 7: Make happiness chase you
  • Tip 8: Be neurotic
  • Tip 9: Always be right
  • Tip 10: Be perfect
  • One Response

    1. Craig Bailey July 23, 2007

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